The Collected Regrets of Clover

The Collected Regrets of Clover is a novel published in 2023 by Mikki Brammer. Set in New York City, the narrative follows Clover, a death doula, in her role of helping individuals confront the last period of their lives before death. This often involves coming to terms with their regrets through personal and philosophical reflections. The novel’s plot introduces various characters and narratives, each focused on a different client of the protagonist, to explore regret and the potential for healing. In addition, romantic love is a significant aspect of the narrative, illustrating the characters’ growth in response to their experiences. Clover’s character arc is central to the narrative as she gradually confronts her own sorrows and fears. The novel explores death as avoidance of life, loss and grief, and confronting regrets. These themes are inspired by the death positivity movement, which promotes an open and understanding attitude toward death through human connection, therapy, and art.

Mikki Brammer is an Australian-born author living in New York. She has also spent time in France and Spain. In addition to writing fiction, she contributes to publications on art, architecture, and interior design. The Collected Regrets of Clover is her first novel. The story was inspired by Brammer’s desire to examine the stigma and taboos surrounding death in Western society. However, the book focuses just as much on life as it does on death, as Clover learns that quality of life means not only an open attitude toward death but also an openness to life, with all the risks and surprises that it brings.

This guide refers to the 2003 Penguin e-book edition.

Content Warning: The source material features frank discussions of death and prolonged grief, as well as brief discussions of alcohol addiction.

Plot Summary

Clover Brooks, the protagonist, is a death doula whose job is to help individuals confront their end-of-life experiences with compassion and understanding. The novel’s 55 chapters provide glimpses of Clover’s relationships with her clients. Moreover, the book addresses Clover’s past and present situations in life, followed by a character transformation as she learns to open up to the world.

Clover is 36 years old and leads a lonesome, isolated life. Clover’s life choices are informed by the following factors: witnessing the death of her kindergarten teacher; the loss of her parents when she was only six years old; the natural curiosity and candid approach to death she has expressed since childhood; and the influence of her grandfather, the contemplative and distant academic who raised her. Clover’s deepest regret is having been away on a trip to Asia when her grandfather died alone of a heart attack. She has only one friend, Leo, an elderly neighbor who was also a friend of her grandfather.

Clover lives in a rent-controlled apartment in New York City that she inherited from her grandfather. She spends her time between appointments as a death doula watching romantic comedy films. Occasionally, she goes to death cafés—places where participants can talk openly about their experiences, concerns, and fears surrounding death. In one such café, she meets Sebastian, a man approximately her age who expresses interest in her. However, Clover avoids interacting with him because she is afraid of emotional openness and being hurt. She likewise attempts to avoid Sylvie, a new neighbor who moves into her building.

However, Clover keeps encountering Sebastian, and she eventually admits to him that she is a death doula. Clover’s persistent grief for her grandfather and her painful memories of being rejected in social situations prevent her from allowing Sebastian into her life. At the same time, Clover accepts the budding friendship with Sylvie, which grows into an intimate connection later in the book. While still apprehensive about Sebastian, she agrees to visit his dying grandmother, Claudia, who becomes an inspiring figure for Clover.

At Sylvie’s advice, Clover decides to go on a date with Sebastian. In a bar, they share stories, and an unexpected kiss takes place—Clover’s first. However, she does not enjoy it and leaves the date flustered. Clover continues to visit Claudia, who reveals that she is aware of her prognosis and that her family has been trying to hide it from her. The two discuss Claudia’s end-of-life plans as well as Claudia’s life as a photojournalist in France before she got married and returned to New York. Claudia shares her regrets with Clover, including the sacrifices she made for her family and a brief, meaningful encounter with a man named Hugo while she was in Europe. Clover ponders how to help Claudia overcome one of her regrets before her time runs out. She discusses the details with Sylvie, who uses her connections to locate Hugo, who had meanwhile moved to the United States and settled in Maine.

Soon after, Clover discovers Sylvie’s romantic relationship with a woman Clover was calling “Julia,” whose intimate marriage with her husband, “Reuben,” Clover had been secretly watching from the window, as the couple lives in the apartment across from hers. Clover reacts angrily, accusing Sylvie of ruining her neighbors’ perfect marriage, which strains the friendship. Meanwhile, Clover and Sebastian go on a road trip to find Claudia’s long-lost lover, Hugo. The relationship between Clover and Sebastian is already tense and breaks down in the middle of their ride to Maine when Sebastian accuses Clover of running away from life and relationships by focusing all her energy on dying people. This moment constitutes the climax of the novel. Clover is initially upset, and a heated argument takes place. However, after reflecting, she decides to continue her journey and help Claudia.

In Maine, Clover and Sebastian find that Hugo, Claudia’s old lover, had died a few months prior. Instead, they find his grandson, who bears the same name as his grandfather. Clover develops a connection with the younger Hugo and opens up about her regrets in life.

In the final chapters, Clover once more meets Hugo, the grandson, who discovers intimate letters between Claudia and his grandfather, including a letter that he had not sent. Clover reads these heartfelt letters to Claudia, who finds solace and resolves to reunite with her lover in the next life. Clover reconciles with Sebastian, who apologizes for his past behavior, and she apologizes to Sylvie, who reveals that she is in an open relationship with the couple who lives across from Clover. Claudia’s funeral takes place, and Clover embarks on a journey in which she meets Hugo in Corsica to scatter Claudia’s ashes into the sea. Clover and Hugo develop a romantic relationship, and Clover starts a new phase of her life in which she is open to taking risks.